I knew that I would, in all likelihood, be having this baby via c-section quite early in my pregnancy. By 32 weeks my baby girl was still a frank breech and very happy about it.
It was around that time that I started talking to my friends who have had c-sections about their experiences. I wanted to know how it went for them, whether it was smooth or tough. I felt like I could “prepare” by knowing all kinds of things that could happen instead of going into it blind. I also began to google and youtube videos of everything from the procedure itself to how to prepare for it (which I later regretted).
I went to the doctor Tuesday November 18th and had a cervical check. My OBGYN advised me I was dilated 4cm and 80% effaced and the c section would be scheduled Thursday of the same week. After the extremely rough pregnancy, constant painful contractions, and sleepless nights, I couldn’t help but cry from relief. I was so happy that all the worrying and misery of the third trimester would finally be over that same week. I would be holding my little girl that same week. I was talked through the procedure by my OBGYN and advised to go to the hospital and get my pre-op blood work completed.
The next day I went on a cleaning rampage, a shopping spree for last minute baby items and repacked and double checked my hospital bags. My last snack was at 9pm as I was told nothing after midnight. I was determined to get some sleep that night. Instead of sleeping I laid awake googling c sections again because I wanted to make sure I was mentally prepared for what was about to happen. I finally fell asleep around 1am and woke to pee around 5am. The OBGYN advised me to arrive at the hospital around 6am to go through a mandatory Ebola check and get IV fluids prior to the surgery.
I was amazed that I was so calm and not nervous at all. My husband and I walked into the emergency entrance where I got my ID bracelet and was escorted to the elevators and straight to the maternity ward. I was brought to my room and immediately handed a hospital gown and told to change and lay in the bed.
About five minutes after I laid down, the door opened, and I was immediately surrounded by nurses asking me questions about whether or not I have been to Africa or came in contact with anyone that could have been exposed to Ebola. Then asked me about my allergies, my pregnancy, whether or not I ate after midnight etc. While one nurse continued to ask me questions another hooked up the monitor for the baby and then began my IV line. Unfortunately, I got the new nurse who was in training. It took about 10 minutes for her to correctly insert the needle and get the line running properly.
It was sort of strange, sitting there with my husband waiting to be walked into the operating room. I still wasn’t nervous at this point. I don’t think it had quite hit me yet. At about 7:10am the anesthetist came in to explain to me what he would be doing and asked me a series of questions on previous surgeries and whether or not I have had anesthesia previously. It wasn’t until he began explaining the procedure that I became nervous. Suddenly it hit me that I was about to have major surgery and I was going to be wide awake through it all. He left the room to prepare everything and the nurses came in and handed my husband his set of scrubs and advised him they would be back to get him when they were ready. I was escorted into the operating room which I noticed was very blue and painted with clouds (I guess to help relax you through the process). I was helped onto the table and advised to sit on the edge. A very kind nurse stood in front of me and showed me how I need to bend over for the spinal to be administered. I could not stop shaking and couldn’t seem to bend my body correctly. The anesthetist told me I needed to relax because I was too tense. After about a minute of bending me and trying to get me in the right position they realized it would be easier to have me sit Indian style and hold onto a pillow and the nurse in front of me.
He numbed me first, which was virtually painless (felt like a bee sting), and then said he was going to insert the spinal. He warned me that my legs would feel warm and the numbing sensation would begin almost immediately. I didn’t feel the spinal go in, but I did feel it start to work immediately. Then I was laid back with help from the nurses. The catheter was inserted, which I didn’t feel, and they began to hang the sheet.
There was conversation happening between the doctors and nurses so it wasn’t completely quiet in the room. I looked up at the ceiling which had the word breathe painted on it. At this point I could feel light touching but there was no pain whatsoever. I could not stop shaking and I began to cry. I was so nervous.
Finally, a nurse escorted my husband in and he sat by my head. He kept rubbing my head and telling me to relax and focus on the fact I would be holding my little girl in a matter of minutes. All I could focus on was the word breathe and the fact that I watched too many youtube videos and I knew what was happening. I looked at my husband with tears pouring out of my eyes and said “I should not have watched those videos, I know what is happening!!” I felt a lot of pressure and a lot of tugging and pushing on my ribcage. My OBGYN advised she was under my rib-cage and they had to push her out. After a few seconds she said “I see a butt!” my husband kept talking to me and trying to calm me down.
About three minutes later at exactly 8am they announced she is here and I heard a tiny whimper. I had always assumed she was going to cry or scream, but it was such a tiny cute whimper. My husband looked at me with tears flowing down his face and said “You did it!” They wiped her down and brought her to me for some skin to skin time. All the anxiety melted away. I could feel her breathing on my chest and heard her soft cooing sounds. I have never been happier than I was at this moment.
After a few minutes they escorted my husband and our new daughter out of the room while they finished the surgery. I laid there for about 10 minutes still crying and still in shock from it all. I watched the anesthetist add some medication to my IV and I felt out of it. The OBGYN announced everything was done and took down the curtain. They moved me from the operating table to the hospital bed and wheeled me into the delivery room where my husband and new baby girl were waiting for me.
She was being wrapped up while a nurse was asking me to monitor my pain level. She was also encouraging me to move my legs. As soon as I could move both of my legs, we could go to the room we were staying in and family could come visit. Chris and I stayed in the recovery room for about 45 minutes until I was finally wheeled into my hospital room where I would stay the next three days.
The rest of the day and night I remained hooked up to the IV and the catheter. They removed them both the next morning after the doctor visited and gave the okay. I was given two Percocet and told to walk for the first time. It was very painful and terrifying. I felt like my insides were going to fall out of my incision. I stayed on top of my pain pills and took them every time they were offered. I needed a lot of help getting out of the hospital bed, going to the bathroom, and pulling my pants up. But in the end, it was all worth it.
The overall experience was amazing. I have never felt closer to my husband as I did after these few days. I have never loved anything as much as I love my daughter. The pain from the surgery for the entire week was horrible, but when I look at my daughter, the pain and all the anxiety of it all just melts away. I am so happy to have my rainbow baby.
From this day on my life would be different…
survivingmotherhood545.wordpress.com 